Valentine’s When You’re Single
Unlike many of my godly living posts, this post is geared mainly toward teen girls. However, some of the concepts can be just as relatable to anyone else, so feel free to give it a read and let me know what you think!
Valentine’s When You’re Single
When I hear girls talk about hating or dreading Valentine’s Day I can’t help but cringe.
At the same time, girls who think of it only as a time for a romantic evening with a boyfriend get the same response from me.
The holiday can be about so much more than receiving chocolate or flowers from a boyfriend, or hating the very idea of it because of past rejection. Here’s a new concept: Valentine’s can be for the single too.
Want to know more? Read on!
How I Regard Valentine’s Day
I will readily confess to you that Valentine’s is (nearly) my most favorite holiday. I love it – the colors (even though I’m an earthy-kind of girl normally), the decorations, and the over-all feeling of it. I decorate for Valentine’s with as much gusto as I do Thanksgiving and Christmas. And here’s a shocker: I’ve never had a date for Valentine’s!
You may think me crazy, and you’re probably right in most cases, but let me explain myself.
Growing up, we celebrated Valentine’s together as a family by creating our own traditions. Mom would prepare a special meal that we would eat by candlelight on a table that she had carefully decorated. I would prepare a special dessert (usually loaded with chocolate!) and we’d enjoy it while watching a generally-agreed upon “romantic” film.
It’s simple but so very special, and we wouldn’t have it any other way. And even though I have never received flowers or chocolates from a boyfriend, I love the holiday and look forward to it every year.
A Few Misconceptions
As with many things, Valentine’s Day carries with it a lot of presuppositions and misconceptions that create pressure on a person to conform to one accepted way of belief. Such as,
1. It’s all about romance, thus
2. It’s only for couples
3. You shouldn’t celebrate it alone, and
4. You shouldn’t celebrate it with family and close friends.
With this mindset you miss out terribly on more meaningful and lasting relationships with those you are already close to.
The Downsides of the World’s Mindset
The fact is, there is nothing wrong with making a date for Valentine’s, receiving little gifts, and sending sweet cards. I’m sure it can be a really special feeling to have someone to spend it with. And yet it seems to me a more suitable practice for those who are serious about their relationship or already married.
Think of it this way: when the happiness of your holiday depends on something so superficial as whether you have a date like every one else or not, you may want to reconsider the way you think.
Looking at Valentine’s Differently
The problem lies in our perspective. Instead of sitting by and waiting for a guy to make your day, look around you at your family and friends and see whose day you can make. Try thinking about the needs of others this Valentine’s Day, instead of whether we have pleasant plans of our own.
Here are some ideas on how we can make it more meaningful, and in turn inspire others to look at it differently as well.
1. Don’t wait to be sent a Valentine, send your own to your family and close friends.
2. Make plans involving your family and close friends.
3. Start your own traditions.
Do you cook? Make a special dinner. Or compose a poem or song, write a letter, send a card, make a gift, or even make some calls. Get creative and find ways to make someone else’s Valentine’s Day.
In fact, you should approach all of life in this way. Don’t look at this time in your life as a time when you are alone and out of place. Thank God for those you have around you now. God has given us single years for a reason – let’s do the best we can with them!
A day is what you make it. You have the privilege to choose.
What are your thoughts on Valentine’s Day? Do you celebrate it or avoid it altogether? Have you ever considered making it a day to serve others? Tell me your thoughts in the comment section below!
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